Tommy wasn't your average teenage letch. He believed in doing things
the old-fashioned way: he'd get down on one knee like a noble prince or
dastardly villan and announce ceremoniously that he was going to grope
the fair lady's bosom. He found his match in Candice, who instead of
looking at him funny or slapping him would strike an "oh, save me
from this brutish man!" pose while exclaiming gently that her virtue
was in danger, then tilt her head back and sigh "whoa is me" when
he'd almost grapple her bust... and he wasn't sure what to do then,
since all the stories he'd read either had her resist or a hero save her.
Which reminds me of a Woody Woodbury joke, circa 1960: A man and woman are in a
car at Lover's Lane getting hot and heavy when the door is yanked open by a burly cop.
"What're you doing in there?!" the cop shouts, and the man squeals "Nothing, officer!"
The cop replies, "Well, get the hell out of the way and let a man take over then!"